friends At last

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Most of us need others to support us mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually. Even when romantic relationships freeze up, when we get laid off, or become ill, we need someone to talk to, someone to acknowledge we are worth talking to, and because of that need, our friendships endure. When life scrambles some of our eggs it truly helps to know we have someone to turn to who would be willing to help us out even if all they can do is listen, hey, even if they are all we have and all they are willing to do is snarl “You shouldn’t oughta done that,” it can be enough to get us over that hump in our throat.

A true religion can turn our winters of black snow into snowy white winters of frolic and ski slopes. Any more, if you have a bug in your ear people can’t tell if you are talking to a true friend just a few feet away or a true friend on the other side of the universe.

It is suspected that children come to earth with various fragments of friendship skills intact. Then those nebulous skills are further polished according to their station in life. The first child or the only child will have a different environment to practice friendship skills in than subsequent children will.

Mothers can impart massive influence on their children’s friendship skills, but this influence can be dissipated by her sharing their environmental space with others, fathers, siblings, babysitters, Aunts, Uncles, etc..

Almost immediately, any void in the child’s sphere of influence will be filled – by someone.

Friendship skills are not honed as a matter of accident or chance. Parents have the discretionary responsibillity to train their child’s friendship skills which can help them form life-long friendships even in their earliest years.

What they don’t learn from their parents will be absorbed from peers accidentally included in that child’s sphere of contact, television, books, and later their teachers. As time rushes on each child will decide who the authority figures are in his or her life and that choice, for good or ill-will, will ultimately determine the child’s pool of possible friends. But, recognizing the “early on” signs that there is a problem is half the problem solved before it is too late to solve the problem.


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P.S. I’m 75 years old. I’ve been invited into over 100 homes to discuss prevalent problems on a regular basis. If I had only one warning to give it would be to watch your children like a hawk when family members enter the room, and never ever force your child to spend the night with anyone.


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