by Lin Stone
Well-meaning Euro-merican teachers taught me to despise open fires, the fireplace and
the pot-bellied stove. I admit it didn't take much to turn the tide
even while the proof of the pudden was staring me in the face all the time.|
"Freeze to death on one side and burn up on the other," they said and all their adherents chorused after them in the same tune.
Sounds awful, doesn't it, kind of like roasting in hell?
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Then I went up to explore a large ranch and came back cold and wet to the
antique cabin. There was no water, no electric, no central heat.
There wasn't even a Gameboy in sight.|
A fireplace was my only resource and there were a thousand acres of wood outside. Obviously it wasn't going to toast me up with central heat, but I remembered how to use the old double-bit axe of my youth and I hurried outside to chop wood before the light outside faded into darkness wherein no man worketh.
I know people calling themselves woodsmen who immediately begin hacking at a big tree to bring it down. Then they chop the trunk up, throwing away the small limbs so they can feverishly begin splitting up the trunk.
Native Americans are lazier than that. Why waste your energy chopping down a big tree when dead branches are lying all over the forest? Throw away the little twigs? Heaven forbid! I have spent weeks in the forest and burned nothing but leaves with a few twigs thrown in accidentally.
This particular evening I hauled in tubs full of leaves and dumped them into the fireplace. A little fire was started and I hurried back outside for an armload of twigs. These were cast casually over the top of the leaves.
I warmed my hands over the flames, first one side, then the other, then I hurried out the door and gathered enough dead limbs to fill the firebox. The fire was going nicely. The whole cabin was toasty warm and the fireplace was the center of attention. Back out I went, this time with the axe. This time I cut some of the larger limbs so that they fit the fireplace and these I brought back in to lay on the fire.
There wasn't a trace of smoke anywhere. Somebody sure had known how to build a chimney. I heated up my supper while the heat from the flames toasted my face red with radiant warmth.
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Have you ever tried to cook supper over a floor vent? You may get that
leg of lamb warm enough to eat before you starve to death.
It isn't true what they say either; you don't freeze to death on one side and burn up on the other at the fireplace. I admit it is true that you CAN burn up on one side and freeze on the other IF you don't have any sense. But there's really no need of it.
People with a little bit of sense can rotate their body a little bit at a time until the whole of it is toasty warm. People with even more sense can turn their body so that a great rush of heat is applied right where it feels best while murmuring, OOOH, and AHHH! which seems to increase the sense of pleasure to its highest degree.
People with an extraordinary high I.Q will sit back and let their feet soak up the heat and carry it throughout the body until ALL their juices are sputtering at just the right temperature.
As my had lolled on my pillow I breathed deeply and recalled those cold winter morns when I swam the river and walked four miles to a wood-framed house beside the bus stop. I was welcome there and the temperature inside was just right for human habitation. But you know what? There wasn't any place in that whole house that I could snuggle up to and take the chill out of my bones. You can't even get your feet warm in a hurry with central heat.
How many other times had I walked into a warm house and could not get warm to save my life because it had central heat and air? Oh Gee! Oh Gee! Stop these bones from chattering! Give me some heat I can throw my back to and let it roast. I don't care if it burns the shirt off my back if my bones will just stop chattering.
It is the primitive pleasures
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That shiny stainless surface may look like a clean, sterile surface to you, but to a microbe it's a landscape littered with mountains and valleys with plenty of dark corners to hide in. The bad news is that one little microbe can turn into four million microbes inside of just eight hours. The plain fact is that YOUR KITCHEN needs your watchful eye to make it safe. Our FREE report will show you where to look, and what to look for. Click HERE.
About the author: Independently less than wealthy,
Lin Stone writes how to articles to help the writing trade.
His first book, HOW TO BUY LAND AT TAX SALES, is so good
it is still selling after eight years. Lin's latest contributions
are posted on http://www.amazon.com/-/e/B001K8SDAA
Discover these great essays in the following folders
Family * Social * War * Freedom * Money *
And then, we have these essays in the GENERAL ESSAYS category which don't seem to fit anywhere in particular:
By Reason Alone.. That Roosevelt can do no wrong is Burroughs's opinion; and that Burroughs is always right is Roosevelt 's opinion. Both are agreed that animals do not reason. They assert that all animals below man are automatons and perform actions only of two sorts 'mechanical and reflex 'and that in such actions no reasoning enters at all. They believe that man is the only animal capable of reasoning and that ever does reason.
No man is an island, is an old saying that was meant to say that no man stood alone, but needed help from others, and gave strength to others. But, here is the story of an island that was a man. In the short history of time, there was one island that was a monument to a single man. It starts out like a fairy tale.. Once upon a time there was a barren island. This almost insignificant little man was sent off to this barren island and turned it into a mirror of his soul and the fulfillment of his vision. One stick at a time he turned his barren island into a work of lasting, world-renowned beauty and peace, an island where the nightingales sang songs of singular wonder ne'er found elsewhere since this little man set down roots on a barren island, and bloomed.
Have you ever noticed that most of man's dreams are based on false assumptions. We dream of loping free with the wolves, but really don't like fleas. We dream of the security that lambs must feel, but don't want to be sheared. We dream of being lions, but gag at eating raw meat. We dream of being loved, but can't see the way or take the time to make ourselves lovable.
Was There EVER A Man On The Moon? How far can reason alone take us from the beaten path of acknowledged history?
A Definition Of History by Leo Tolstoy gives us yet another peg to hang our ratiocinations upon.
Definition of Art?
Charity never faileth, especially when our hearts fill to overflowing with charity.
When Theories fail.. Petty science teachers can rage until doomsday that no two snowflakes are identical, but until every snowflake that has ever fallen or ever shall fall is matched against every other snowflake that has already fallen or ever shall try to fall -- the identical snowflake theory remains just a theory resting on its oars out there in lolly-gagging land.
Deliberate Fraud: Evolutionists resort to the lowest forms of fraud in order to gain more believers. Down and Dirty with Darwin Evolutionists are now feeling so battered that university professors advise their students not to discuss this theory with non-believers. "Sounds like a religious cult to me," say some.
Global Warming freezes thermometers 57 years ago there was this silly theory running through the kitchen that said "the quickest way to freeze ice was to fill the ice trays with boiling water. There are still a few old house wives that believe it works. These days it's the pseudo-scientists that believe global warm winds tearing through the polar regions will make the ice caps freeze solid and start a new ice age!
Man, the Meanie of the Planet. This is a high resolution pdf document so you can print it out and hang it on the wall. Be sure to RIGHT Click the link, and save it to your computer.
Fuzzy Logic Clarified This is another essay you will want to keep handy where you can print it out.
Are we forever Doomed? An essayic poem by Rudyard Kipling
I see Grandpa. He's calling out for me.
God Does Not Fit -- by Lance Nalley
That first day of school
A Break From Boredom -- by Lance Nalley
INVICTUS... Out of the night that covers me, Black as the Pit, from pole to pole
The gods and Heroes of the Ancient World
Staunch, steadfast, loyal and true. What better friend can a man have?
The House By The Side Of The Road
Friendship, by Ralph Waldo Emerson. A ruddy drop of manly blood The surging sea outweighs, The world uncertain comes and goes, The lover rooted stays. I fancied he was fled, And, after many a year, Glowed unexhausted kindliness Like daily sunrise there. My careful heart was free again, -- O friend, my bosom said, Through thee alone the sky is arched, Through thee the rose is red, All things through thee take nobler form, And look beyond the earth, And is the mill-round of our fate A sun-path in thy worth. Me too thy nobleness has taught To master my despair; The fountains of my hidden life Are through thy friendship fair.
This Web is MY Web
A thing of beauty is a joy forever:
Its loveliness increases; it will never
Pass into nothingness; but still will keep
A bower quiet for us, and a sleep
Full of sweet dreams, and health, and quiet breathing.
The Moon on Six Pence Uncle Bob was an unforgettable character who traveled the world on bargain rates and golden smiles!
The Almost Good Housekeeping monograph is a good excuse for the harried homemaker to put off until tomorrow all those burdens of yesteryear, and quit trying so hard.
Sex before the Sax: The first thing I learned about Lois was she had a label for being froward. Kids at school said she had had sex with Alfred. Not long after I arrived, another boy came forward to admit he had made a score at her door.
Old Rattler, and the King Snake.
Pleasures of the open fire: The Fireplace Revisited.
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